stop caring, start creating.

alright, this isn’t going to be a structured letter, I’m just going to be sharing my stream of consciousness through my writing, no filter, straight up just velp.

i want to make more posts like this, but for some reason or another i feel this strange need to create structure, almost like a book or one of those professional written newsletters, but funnily enough, i never end up getting nothing done when i think of it like that.

which is what i wanted to make this letter on: the idea of not giving a fuck.

as i sip on my coffee right now in a starbucks, i think of all those times i’ve been held back by giving a fuck.

all those times i cared too much about what i put out, the way in which i put it out, all the times i was held back by fear, doubt, uncertainty.

and doing things out of the expectation of other people, molding myself in a certain way to be someone im not, straight up just people pleasing.

those were the worst times of my life, i felt so trapped in this facade i built for myself, i found it hard to truly connect with myself.

one thing i would suggest if you’re in a similar position is figuring out what it stems from, question everything.

why are you doing what you’re doing?

why are you saying what you’re saying?

does it align with you? or do you feel something in your heart telling you somethings off?

these questions will challenge you, it will be uncomfortable, but the most important thing is being honest with yourself.

if it doesn’t feel right now, i promise you it won’t feel right in the future, even in better circumstances.

don’t create present hell for a future heaven that might not even exist.

another thing is straight up, stop caring, because no one cares.

no one cares about you as much as you try to kiss up to them, and please them, some people find that inauthentic and manipulative.

everyone is focused on their own world, in the things they’re busy with

so the best thing you can do for other people and your own mental health is keeping it a buck, just remove those filters, those masks.

and if someone doesn’t like the real you, with your dialect and uniqueness, guess what

that’s another win. because now you’ve filtered someone you wouldn’t have vibed with to begin with

build that courage to be disliked, because that is true freedom.

true freedom is being cringe, doing what you really want, as you please, and being okay with those weird looks, with the right intention.

this gets better with time, some people are like this right off the bat, but for others like me and you, we need to work for it.

we need to expose ourselves to new things, new experiences

the most important part is taking that first step.

because you can really only know yourself, when you expose yourself.